I came from a typical blue collar family upbringing. My relatives were miners in Minnesota. My dad was a postman then a cop. My mom worked office jobs and then part-time store positions. Life was "normal". We woke up, went to work, and went about business. Our focus was on the future goals. Where would we retire. Where and when would we finally do the things that our working to live had slowed down? Everything I wanted to do at 18 to accelerate that pace was shot down. The Navy was too scary for my mom to contemplate. They sighed with relief when my eyesight made me ineligible to be a police officer. And police work being something I knew, I went into the civilian side. It has been a rewarding 28 years serving the public. But that's not what this post is about.
Through working at times 7 days a week, and no reserves for the luxuries in life, I learned to take pleasure in the little things. Sunrise and sunset would rock me with their boundless beauty. A quiet day to play outside, in perfect temperatures, was a good day. A bicycle seat for my toddler to sit in while we rode up and down the street was joyful. His giggles reaching my ears with the word "faster, faster mommy!" Wow, I wish I had a digital camera back then - pictures were expensive and many moments were not photographed. But they live on in my memory.
The kids are now 29 and soon to be 31. My step-son is 33. My grandchildren are 3 and 11 months old. I want them to remember and learn about the pleasure of documenting the little moments in life and how monumentally important those little moments are to building who we become.
People who know me personally know I quit writing because my mom died. She was my muse. She was the reason I found the "little things" in life each day - both good and bad. and why I wrote about them for her. The day-to day events share a lot more about us as a person, than that "once in a lifetime trip" memory. Don't take me wrong, those big events are important to share or celebrate; it is our daily actions that define who we are to the world - to the people we call family, as friends and how we are the parent we are to our children.
Many of my early memories settle around playing hide and seek, laying on the green grass and watching the clouds move, imaging each angel that was lying on it as it made it's way across the earth. The jump rope games we played over and over.
When mom moved to Minnesota and suffered from acute and unexpected homesickness for the family home in Illinois, we concentrated on the "little things" each day.
Mom taught me about the feel of fabric, the needle in my hand for cross stitching, the early love of computers and video games. I learned about tactile sensations long before i knew what that meant. My maternal grandmother taught me Finnish and about cooking, canning and how to drink coffee at age 4 (milk with a dash of coffee). My maternal grandfather taught me about always putting family first. Family comes before you, before anything material or selfish.
So take the time to sit down with your children and build a memory. Play patty-cake. Go buy a long jump rope or just buy a buy a long rope. In our day we tied on end to garage door handles. Now so many door today have glossy fronts. So find a tree, a porch or deck rail. Teach your child how to jump so eventually you can sing songs to it. http://www.gameskidsplay.net/jump_rope_ryhmes/
My favorite was Miss Mary Mack:
Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack
All dressed in black, black, black
With silver buttons, buttons, buttons
All down her back, back, back
She asked her mother, mother, mother
For fifty cents, cents, cents
To see the elephant, elephant, elephant
Jump the fence, fence fence
They jumped so high, high, high
They touched the sky, sky, sky
And didn't come back, back, back
Till the fourth of July, July, July
Contributed by Angela Martin and Heidi Wallis
Or, add to the end the following lines:
He jumped so high, high, high
He touched the sky, sky, sky
And he never came back, back, back
Till the fourth of July, July, July!
So in remembrance of my mom, I ask that you celebrate your children. That you take the time to find one little thing to appreciate in each day. Write them down as time allows. Buy a smart watch and put day one journal on it. You can dictate your brief journal entry.
Happy Mother's Day in Heaven mom. Thank you for teaching me about the importance of small things each day. I miss having you to read the newspaper to. I miss laughing about inconsequential things. I miss the essence of you. The wonder you showed at all the small events in life. The wonder of love. The ability to throw back my head and laugh.
